Well I finally stopped debating and took some action.
I have left the Clerics Guild for good.
I wrote a farewell note, which I handed to Scyber to send to the Guild as a whole, I packed up all of my things from the guild building and I left.
(I still have my island, and will keep it until I can find another quiet spot to make a natural haven in.)
I realised the only thing keeping me was the people.
I had lost all faith in the stability of realm, the likelihood of anything happening for UK timed people, my search for the natural in the 'realm of castles' and my ability to work with the 'free' roleplay model.
So my heart wasn't truly there anymore. Better to have a cleric who still has faith to lead.
So I say farewell to Parlamay, my created Goddess, and hope that she ends up in safe hands.
I say farewell to all the wonderful clerics who I have had the honour of being with over this year,
and as I approach my Rez day, I look at how I might find future inspiration in Second Life.
Anyone with any ideas?